Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Kind of another anniversary

I always get a bit soppy when w2b is away, even if it's for a relatively short period. Tonight she's taking advantage of our company's box at Old Trafford and watching Man Utd play Barnet. So in the mood of soppiness, I started to reminisce and realised that it's kind of another one of our anniversaries.

So when we left our story, w2b and I had passed like ships in the night. We'd got on well and there was the tiniest undercurrent of mutual attraction, but we returned to our daily lives unaware of there being any more.

For the month of October we had a bit of correspondence, but just the usual support-client stuff - nothing more. Then (and yes, this is a very innocuous and dry way for a relationship to start) I sent a Company Satisfaction survey out to all the users of the product that w2b was working with. The survey was all handled anonymously, so I had no idea who was saying what in the responses and a week after sending it out I sent a blanket email out to all potential respondents saying that the survey would only run for a short while longer... here's how the conversation progressed (thankyou to our CRM database here):

w2b,

The on-line survey has proved very popular so far, with results coming in thick and fast. If you have already responded to the survey, then many thanks. If you have not yet had the chance, then please be aware that the survey will be shut down at 5:30pm on Monday 3rd November.

Note that the survey has been run on a strictly anonymous basis, so if there are any issues raised in the survey that you need to discuss with us in person please contact us directly.

Regards,

mms

Hi mms,

I have completed the survey, I was probably one of the first :-) I have a couple of things that I need to discuss with you but I'll give you a call later... what is the best number to get hold of you on?

Regards,

w2b

Thanks w2b. Hopefully you said nice things. Ring me on #### ######.

I said ALL nice things about you ;-) and I even mentioned you by name (I hope my cheque is in the post :-)

I'll put you on the Christmas card list. Rumours about the kind of money we IT types make are vastly exaggerated.

I'll look forward to the card, as long as your number's on the back.

Such a smooth talker... such a minx.

So we talked. We started flirting. The calls got more frequent and more intense. Nothing like this had ever happened to me before. I went into this thinking that it would be a bit of fun - I'd been single for way too long and the attention was exactly what I needed. But I was starting to get really strong feelings for this girl.

We would talk first thing in the morning. We would email each other all through the day. We would talk and IM all through the evening and night. It got to the point where I knew w2b better than most of my friends.

But we always steered clear of the habitual "I love you" at the end of the call. Despite the feelings that we admitted to each other neither of us were naive enough to believe that we could fall in love with someone who we'd only met once and had only shared time with in a completely platonic way. I think we also had too much respect for the word and for each other to just throw it away in conversation.

So we started to feel like we should meet up. Whatever this relationship was, it couldn't go any further without some kind of physical connection. I started to get a bit scared. This was only around six months after Sid had come along and I wasn't particularly comfortable with myself. How could someone else accept him when I wasn't sure I had yet?

Luckily help came in the fact that when I had originally met w2b I had told one of her colleagues all about Sid. So I hinted and hinted and then finally told her to ask the colleague why I might be reticent about meeting up. She said she would and I waited.

She was fantastic. She didn't pretend it wasn't a big deal. But on the other hand she didn't act like it was some kind of terrible discovery. She was understanding and she asked questions. She said that if anything her feelings for me were stronger because I had disclosed this to her (admittedly in a cowardly way).

So we arranged for w2b to come up to Chester and visit. It would be a Friday night and she cunningly arranged to have to be back in London on the Saturday night - you've got to admire a girl for putting in place a pre-emptive exit strategy that would minimise embarrassment all round.

I needn't have worried. In spite of my inability to get food from plate to mouth without half of it going down my front at dinner and my misgivings about the prospect of being seen naked - bag and all - by a girl who wasn't a nurse it went fantastically well. We spent an amazing night together. There was passion, there was talking, there was comfort in being with someone who I'd grown to care so deeply about and being able to reach over and touch that person whenever I wanted. We spent a great day together, proving to ourselves that this wasn't just a correspondence thing and neither was it just a passion thing. When Saturday evening came and w2b had to head back I was both sad that she was going and wonderfully happy that she was even more than I'd hoped.

I could admit it now. I was completely, absolutely in love.

The following months were spent in feverish correspondence. Our phone bills were astronomical. Virtually every weekend was spent together (mainly her coming to see me, but also vice versa).

The more I got to know her the more utterly, bewilderingly blown away I was by her. She could hold her own in any company (she went to our Christmas dinner at work and I never once had to worry about whether she would be comfortable with my colleagues or what she might say to them). She was refreshingly, almost painfully honest. I never had to second guess what she was thinking or worry about what she was doing when I wasn't with her. Plus, she was one of the most beautiful girls I had ever met - with massive green eyes, a voice that could make my heart skip and... God I could go on for hours, but I'll only bore you and make w2b horribly embarrassed when she inevitably comes to read this.

Somehow we had become committed to each other wholly and unequivocally, without any discussion. We knew that this was something special. It was just after Christmas and already we could talk matter of factual about spending the rest of our lives together. I jokingly mentioned marriage and somehow it sounded right. From then on, without a proper proposal (that would come later) we simply assumed that marriage would be a logical next step for us. It was testament to a modern take on the old fashioned way that people used to get together - an extended, non-physical courtship followed only after getting to know someone truly intimately by a physical relationship. With the physical relationship merely supplementing a love that was already there but not fully accepted until then.

We had the odd bump along the way (which I or w2b may fill you in on at some point). But somehow everything seemed to find it's own way of fitting into place.

In May 2004, w2b packed all her belongings (a surprisingly large amount of belongings actually, when you think she'd arrived in London less than a year earlier with just one bag) into her little Clio that she'd just bought and we drove up to Chester to start our lives together.

Two dogs and a wrecked house that may never be finished later and I am still blissfully happy. I am also unbelievably thankful of the hand that fate dealt me.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is a lovely story and I am happy for you. There is nothing I can think of that is better than being married to one's true love.

Zinnia Cyclamen said...

That is a great story, and you tell it really well.

Villagepig said...

Hello my love :-)

Believe me you've made it easier than I ever imagined it could be.

I am truly a lucky person for having found my soulmate.

And I love you very very much!

A

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